2009 Post Mortem.
(OK, yeah, I know. I haven't posted on here since October of 2008. Let's just say that I haven't really had all that much to say - at least, nothing real positive. So I've been keeping my virtual mouth shut.)
January 1, 2010 ... so time for a review of what 2009 was for me, and indirectly some of those around me. And now, down into the rabbit hole ....
2009 was the second worst year of my life, without question. The worst was 1995 - that was the year that I was forced into the wheelchair by the Malignant Simian which lives on my back, coupled with a shall we say less than positive living situation at the time. But that's over; 14, almost 15 years ago and I'm past that for the most part. (Some things that happened during that period will NEVER go away.) Back to 2009.
As of right now, I've been unemployed since shortly after I created the last entry in this blog in 10/2008. On 10/31/08, my contract @ Real Networks ended ... and the soundtrack to my work life has consisted of a lot of really loud cricket sounds since then. I've had exactly three face to face interviews since then - two of which looked very, very good after the interviews concluded, and one which was screwed from start to finish. I'll describe these, but please understand that I'm not going to name the companies involved, or anyone with whom I spoke at any of them, because it's just not appropriate and I'm not interested in "calling anyone out", so to speak.
The first interview was back in November of 2008 - and I think that I fucked this one up myself; in looking back on it, I gave very poor answers to questions that are just easy - stuff that I deal with on a daily basis. I wasn't surprised not to be offered that position. This one was my own fault. I blame no one other than myself.
The second interview was in March of 2009. It went very well - I was given a copy of the feedback given to the recruiter afterwards. Every single point they had was positive. They were concerned that, given the fact that I've been around quite a bit over the past few years due to contracting and failed startups, that I'd be a flight risk. I can understand this, however, I made it a point to address this with three of the four people with whom I spoke, to assure them that I'm looking for something permanent, am tired of floating around from job to job, and basically am just looking for a home. I don't think I stuttered at any point ... but apparently I was unable to get my point across successfully.
Nothing at all until around November 2009, although I apply for at least 3 positions each and every week. (This is difficult. 16 years of experience isn't enough anymore?) I finally got a call in regards to a position for which I'd applied back in August. A phone interview was done, which went well, so I was called in for a F2F. This also went well - so a second F2F interview with the entire team with whom I'd be working was setup. This interview also went well. Trying to stay as non-biased as possible, after the interview was over I was of the opinion that I'd be shocked if I didn't get an offer.
Well, I'm still shocked. Apparently I was *too* technical for that job. Ugh.... I think they made a really big mistake. But hey, it's their team. I don't know their thought processes. Maybe I didn't hold my mouth right. Maybe it's the wheelchair. I don't know. I'm not going to spend a lot of cycles worrying about it. I'm just going to keep pushing ... giving up is not in my vocabulary. But it's frustrating as hell.
So, that's the work situation. It is what it is ... all I can do is keep trying, keep plugging. And I intend to do just that.
In other parts of life ... not all that much better, but not entirely negative either. As far as relationships with the opposite sex are concerned, I'm not going to go into vivid detail, but I will say this: this year has taught me that I need to stay away from situations where I'm only important to the other person when it's convenient for her. Need to stick with relationships where feelings are equal on both sides. I'm not getting into anything again where I'm just fine when she wants to bitch and moan about this or that, yet other times I'm completely ignored. This is what I've been dealing with for most of the past year ... and I'm done with that. Life's far too short for that ... speaking of which:
Turned 40 in September, boy that makes me feel great. Not. I should neither worry nor stress out about it; there's not a damned thing I - or anyone else - can do about it. But that doesn't mean I have to like it, either.
On to more positive things. My health has stayed, for the most part, constant this year in that I've not had any real bad MS exacerbations. I can still live alone and take care of myself, and do. Having grown up an only child, I'm used to being alone and entertaining myself; living inside my own mind, if you will.
Saw some really great shows this year! The second week in September was great - on 9/13, I went to the Seahawks season opener with Rich, my best friend from college. The 'Hawks actually won the game and we had hope for the rest of the season ... but alas, the sucking started pretty quickly after that. Right now they're the worst Seahawks team I've seen in 30+ years. Rock bottom has arrived!
Then, on 9/15, my friend Monty & I went to see Porcupine Tree @ the Moore Theatre. What a great, amazing show! It was the first time they'd played the 55 minute epic "The Incident" in front of a live crowd - they did not disappoint at all! Their opening act was off the hook as well ... That 1 Guy. One of the coolest things I'd seen in a very long time and a terrific, fitting opener for Porcupine Tree.
On 11/15 I was able to check an item off my personal "bucket list" when my friend Jeff & I went to see KISS @ Key Arena here in Seattle. Now, I've been a KISS apologist for most of my life - since 1975 - but I had never gotten the chance to see them. If anyone had told me back in 1975 that I'd one day see KISS live, but I'd have to wait until I was 40 and Gene was 60, I'd have laughed and told them they needed to report to the nearest loony bin. But that's how it happened! KISS were great, everything I expected them to be - and NEEDED them to be. I'm glad I got the chance to see the KISS live spectacle before they've run their course.
That's about it for 2009. For the most part, it's sucked donkey balls. Still, I head into 2010 with a positive frame of mind. It can't get worse. It's going to get better. Right?
Right?
January 1, 2010 ... so time for a review of what 2009 was for me, and indirectly some of those around me. And now, down into the rabbit hole ....
2009 was the second worst year of my life, without question. The worst was 1995 - that was the year that I was forced into the wheelchair by the Malignant Simian which lives on my back, coupled with a shall we say less than positive living situation at the time. But that's over; 14, almost 15 years ago and I'm past that for the most part. (Some things that happened during that period will NEVER go away.) Back to 2009.
As of right now, I've been unemployed since shortly after I created the last entry in this blog in 10/2008. On 10/31/08, my contract @ Real Networks ended ... and the soundtrack to my work life has consisted of a lot of really loud cricket sounds since then. I've had exactly three face to face interviews since then - two of which looked very, very good after the interviews concluded, and one which was screwed from start to finish. I'll describe these, but please understand that I'm not going to name the companies involved, or anyone with whom I spoke at any of them, because it's just not appropriate and I'm not interested in "calling anyone out", so to speak.
The first interview was back in November of 2008 - and I think that I fucked this one up myself; in looking back on it, I gave very poor answers to questions that are just easy - stuff that I deal with on a daily basis. I wasn't surprised not to be offered that position. This one was my own fault. I blame no one other than myself.
The second interview was in March of 2009. It went very well - I was given a copy of the feedback given to the recruiter afterwards. Every single point they had was positive. They were concerned that, given the fact that I've been around quite a bit over the past few years due to contracting and failed startups, that I'd be a flight risk. I can understand this, however, I made it a point to address this with three of the four people with whom I spoke, to assure them that I'm looking for something permanent, am tired of floating around from job to job, and basically am just looking for a home. I don't think I stuttered at any point ... but apparently I was unable to get my point across successfully.
Nothing at all until around November 2009, although I apply for at least 3 positions each and every week. (This is difficult. 16 years of experience isn't enough anymore?) I finally got a call in regards to a position for which I'd applied back in August. A phone interview was done, which went well, so I was called in for a F2F. This also went well - so a second F2F interview with the entire team with whom I'd be working was setup. This interview also went well. Trying to stay as non-biased as possible, after the interview was over I was of the opinion that I'd be shocked if I didn't get an offer.
Well, I'm still shocked. Apparently I was *too* technical for that job. Ugh.... I think they made a really big mistake. But hey, it's their team. I don't know their thought processes. Maybe I didn't hold my mouth right. Maybe it's the wheelchair. I don't know. I'm not going to spend a lot of cycles worrying about it. I'm just going to keep pushing ... giving up is not in my vocabulary. But it's frustrating as hell.
So, that's the work situation. It is what it is ... all I can do is keep trying, keep plugging. And I intend to do just that.
In other parts of life ... not all that much better, but not entirely negative either. As far as relationships with the opposite sex are concerned, I'm not going to go into vivid detail, but I will say this: this year has taught me that I need to stay away from situations where I'm only important to the other person when it's convenient for her. Need to stick with relationships where feelings are equal on both sides. I'm not getting into anything again where I'm just fine when she wants to bitch and moan about this or that, yet other times I'm completely ignored. This is what I've been dealing with for most of the past year ... and I'm done with that. Life's far too short for that ... speaking of which:
Turned 40 in September, boy that makes me feel great. Not. I should neither worry nor stress out about it; there's not a damned thing I - or anyone else - can do about it. But that doesn't mean I have to like it, either.
On to more positive things. My health has stayed, for the most part, constant this year in that I've not had any real bad MS exacerbations. I can still live alone and take care of myself, and do. Having grown up an only child, I'm used to being alone and entertaining myself; living inside my own mind, if you will.
Saw some really great shows this year! The second week in September was great - on 9/13, I went to the Seahawks season opener with Rich, my best friend from college. The 'Hawks actually won the game and we had hope for the rest of the season ... but alas, the sucking started pretty quickly after that. Right now they're the worst Seahawks team I've seen in 30+ years. Rock bottom has arrived!
Then, on 9/15, my friend Monty & I went to see Porcupine Tree @ the Moore Theatre. What a great, amazing show! It was the first time they'd played the 55 minute epic "The Incident" in front of a live crowd - they did not disappoint at all! Their opening act was off the hook as well ... That 1 Guy. One of the coolest things I'd seen in a very long time and a terrific, fitting opener for Porcupine Tree.
On 11/15 I was able to check an item off my personal "bucket list" when my friend Jeff & I went to see KISS @ Key Arena here in Seattle. Now, I've been a KISS apologist for most of my life - since 1975 - but I had never gotten the chance to see them. If anyone had told me back in 1975 that I'd one day see KISS live, but I'd have to wait until I was 40 and Gene was 60, I'd have laughed and told them they needed to report to the nearest loony bin. But that's how it happened! KISS were great, everything I expected them to be - and NEEDED them to be. I'm glad I got the chance to see the KISS live spectacle before they've run their course.
That's about it for 2009. For the most part, it's sucked donkey balls. Still, I head into 2010 with a positive frame of mind. It can't get worse. It's going to get better. Right?
Right?
posted by Scott Wedel at 10:56 AM
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